WHINGE and REFLECTION

Andy, just got your sms which has MADE MY DAY! A message from 'home' when i'm feeling so homesick! Thanks so much for 'being there' I really love hearing from you!! Glad you enjoyed your anniversary! xxx

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Talking about the little things that are exciting (like being in one spot for a week)...

One little thing that was exciting was going to the hairdressers!!! I've been waiting to get it cut here in England so at least i can explain in English what i wanted. So it was exciting...to think i'll come out, feeling good, as i usually do after a good session at the hairdressers!

Well, I was feeling good...until i came out that was! I hate my hair! It's HORRIBLE. If i thought it looked bad before i went in, after not having had it cut since January (yes, you read right, it's just been growing and growning until i had to wear my headband to keep it up and out of my eyes).

I now know, it looks doubly worse, now that it's been cut! No kidding....

And for all the girls...You'll know just how i feel. You know, how it is when you've had a crap hair cut! I honestly felt miserable and teary after that....

And yet the local English girl who cut it was so gorgeous. She told me all about the Lake District and her Russian boyfriend and all the bits...and i was really enjoying it after not having any girly conversations for so long.

I politely asked Greg, when he was going to sit in on my haircut, that he'd really enjoy a walk in the park while i got my hair done..

He said, 'Oh it's ok i'll read....' Then asked how long it'd take..

And the girl said, 'Oh! Over half an hour..could be longer..'

So he went for a walk!

The girl laughed and as he walked out said, 'Men just don't understand about girls' haircuts do they!?'

I had to agree!!! A Ladies Hairdressers' are just one of those sancturies where we can go..and just dribble on about girls things and about boys....and enjoy being pampered without anyone watching.

I enjoyed that part. But not her cutting. She didn't chip the way i like, didn't do the wispy bits the way i like...didn't layer the way i liked. Just didn't cut the way i likeeeeeddddd.................(i wail).

And it doesn't help that I'm not having any colours in my hair. I really miss having colours, streaks, foils and something different.

Annie, you'd understand!!!!

Oh! I miss Sue!!! My hairdresser!!! Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh...................and she cut my hair really SHORT before i left, just so i didn't have to go through this drama!!!!! Mum, when you see her, can you tell her i can't wait to get back and have her cut my hair again!

And..i miss my BED! The one we're in at the moment is really lumpy. The springs must be almost coming through the bed! Who'd ever thought beds would be important.

And showers. Every place we go to i have to work out how on earth to use the shower. At the last place we were it was one of those electric showers where you press the button on and you press the button off. The water temperature and pressure is controlled and presto it's done. This one has a shower that you have to twist and turn to make it work. Temperature is monitored but you have to keep adjusting it to have it the way you like it.

Weird thing to stress about but when they're different every time...it can be quite a challenge.

And the hotel smells of oil. If it's not smoke, it's oil. I can't complain, most places have been ok, but it only takes one place to make you feel miserable. And although this place where we're at now is 'average' it's not homely.

And it's so expensive. I know i shouldn't be converting all the time, because it's counter productive and causes us to almost not want to eat at all, but it's quite depressing trying to travel knowing we're blowing our budget on everything - accomodation, food, tours and sightseeing.

At least this afternoon, being in the Windmere Library, it doesn't cost to read! The internet is reasonably priced, in comparison to others, at £2 (two pound) an hour. And in conversion...that's still $10 an hour!!! Ok, no conversions.

Here in England the food is smothered with GRAVY and every meal is served with CHIPS. In Europe everything was smothered with oil, here it's gravy. Grrr.

Should see my waist line. We don't have scales so can only go on the tightness of the pants i'm wearing..and at the moment, the button won't do up! So! I must have put on at least 5kgs! Just having the English breakfasts is doing it i'm sure.

And you sort of feel you should eat the breakfasts because they're included in the B&B and it saves money. And because we need to pay for 365 days of accomodation...PLUS food...we really need to eat if it's included! And then only have 2 meals a day. But fried bacon, fried eggs, fried sausages, fried bread, fried tomatoes..doesn't do much for the waist line does it?

OK. I'm having poached or boiled from now on. This can't go ON.

I can hear mum saying, 'Just enjoy yourselves and don't worry about it' But i tell you, i feel miserable that my clothes aren't fitting!!!

I'm just having a whinge. Sorry. I tell ya....it's the little things like that, that can just break the camel's back. It made me feel homesick. And i was feeling homesick before i went.

I'm having a bit of a reflection too.

Wondering what this is all about?
What purpose there is to having a year away?
Being apart from a normal existence?
Is it self indulgent?
Is there a need for this?
Are we being too industrious in thinking we can do this?
Will we survive it? What are we trying to achieve?
How can we use this experience for better good?
How will this change our thinking?
Improve our life?
Help others?
Is our time used constructively and productively?
How are we growing as people? As a couple?

Why are we doing this?

All those things...and more...are crossing my mind as we move along.

England has been good for that type of reflection.

Perhaps, inately, we need a goal? A mission that is worthwhile and productive?

And do we have that?

WHY?